How You Get Swine Flu

What's worse than email forwards? People who blog about them instead.

This one made me giggle and I thought you might enjoy it too. So, how DO you get the swine flu?


I don't know where the email originated, so sorry I can't give credit to anybody. Too bad. In the mean time, parents, please watch your children more closely at the zoo.

Flickering Pixels

Ever since Tina introduced me to the concept, I have been intrigued by the idea of participating in a blog tour. I love to read and I like to blog (well, occasionally at least), so what better way to tie the two together? I had been waiting on the right book to jump in with and Flickering Pixels by Shane Hipps was the one that caught my attention.

His writing style is anecdotal and easy to read, yet his content is deep and chewy theology. And by chewy, I mean something I can chew on for a good long while. I've probably spent more time processing the book than it actually took me to read it. He has some interesting thoughts on technology and how we, as Christians, interact with it.

There are some other bloggers participating in the tour that have summarized the book's themes more thoroughly than I will do here. I would encourage you to read their discussions if you're interested in learning more. I am opting to discuss a particular chapter that was immediately relevant to me.

In his chapter titled Our Nomadic Life, he discusses how the technology that enables virtual community (i.e. blogs, Facebook, Twitter, etc.) has an unintended side-effect of creating anonymous intimacy.

"The internet has a natural bias toward exhibitionism and thus the erosion of real intimacy. There is nothing exclusive about it, yet it creates, paradoxically, a kind of illusion of intimacy with people we've never met in person."

How timely that I experienced this phenomenon just this morning. Really:

I was working the coffee shop and in walks a fellow I follow on Twitter. We had never met in real life (I recognized him from his profile picture). I inadvertently created an awkward social encounter for which I later kicked myself (and almost tweeted an apology). The conversation was something as follows:

Me: Good morning, welcome to Coffee House!
Him: Hello.
Me: [staring impolitely trying to figure out if he was Twitter Man]
Me: What can I get for you?
Him: Grande coffee.
Me: [overly interested] What's your name?
Him: D---
Me: Is your last name W---?
Him: [starting to get suspicious] Yes.
Me: Oh! [stuck my had out for a handshake] My name is Carrie Dils, a.k.a. cdils. I follow you on Twitter. (Yes, I actually said "a.k.a.")
Me: [continued to blather on entirely too long about irrelevant information]

I finally gave him his coffee and sent him along and he was, to his credit, very gracious. I suppose I just got a little over-excited to meet this guy in person and abandoned my usually-decent social graces. In my defense, I had just downed three shots of espresso.

So, to get back to the discussion, I experienced first-hand this idea of anonymous intimacy (an idea which I had not previously pondered). Here I was meeting a complete stranger, yet I knew details about his job, his family, his car, and so forth. Add to that, I am now privy to his coffee preferences. It was a weird feeling. The fact we had "talked" a few times in a virtual community in no way defined any real relationship between us when we met in person.

Is that bad? No. Is it something to be mindful of when thinking about those I share real community with? I think so. While it's great to have such easy access to friends and family via technology, I need to be careful not to emotionally stay at a safe distance just because technology enables me to do so.

While my virtual community is a great tool for staying in touch with old friends and maybe even making new ones, it is not a substitute for real community. That may sound overly obvious, but I found it good food for thought.

Blog Tour Time!

This week I am participating in my first-ever blog tour with Blog Tour Spot. You may be asking yourself, "what is a blog tour?" Tune back in later this week and find out!

Drive-Thru Etiquette, Part Two

Welcome back, dear students. Today we continue our lesson in Drive-Thru Etiquette, a Handy Reference Guide. I encourage you to reference the legend in the original post should you need any reminders.

Let's talk about the DT lane itself. Though they come in various shapes, lengths, and landscaping designs, here are a few driving rules that always hold true:

1. The DT lane is not a "thru street". It is intended only for patrons of the store. Please do not use as a short-cut to Arby's.
   
2. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCE is it ever advised to put your car in reverse once you have committed to the lane.
3. When approaching the DT window, please aim your car slightly left of center. My arms cannot reach your window if you are in the middle. And I have long arms.
4. Should you be involved in an accident in the DT lane, kindly move your car into the parking lot. I cannot conduct business if you remain parked in my lane.

Rules of the Window

1. I am not an ATM, so please do not thrust your money at me if you are not even looking in my direction. Chances are I will leave your arm there to wilt until I feel like taking your money.
2. If you are parked more than two feet from the window, it is appreciated if you make an effort to reach out and "meet me in the middle" (see above rules on DT Lane Driving). Not everyone is as tall as me and these long reaches out the window can be physically difficult for our shorter and/or pregnant employees.
3. If you see me holding your drink or money out the window, kindly do not make me wait for an extended time in this position while you organize your center console or gather vehicle trash.
   

Inclement Weather

1. I cannot hear your order through a closed or barely-cracked window.
   
2. Nobody likes to be cold and/or wet. Please do not become irritable at me as if I am the cause of the rain coming through your window. After all, you did opt to go through the DT.
3. When you arrive at my window, please turn your windshield wipers OFF. With every swipe, they swoosh water into my face. This is unpleasant.
4. Should road conditions become icy near your home, chances are your neighborhood DT lane is icy as well. Do not be surprised at this. It is recommended that you make coffee at home on these mornings, though, should you venture out, I will be faithfully manning the DT window.
   

Arguing

1. Should you arrive at my SB and proceed to order two-dozen donuts and inform me of your free coupon, do not become upset when I gently inform you that you are NOT at Krispy Kreme. Do not argue with me that I am Krispy Kreme. Do not tell me that Krispy Kreme used to be in this location and must have "just moved" to the building next door. Do not become hostile and ask me why I don't have donuts. Do not become exceedingly agitated with me if I politely ask you if you would like a cup of coffee before you drive over to Krispy Kreme. And, WHATEVER YOU DO, don't put your car in reverse and slam on the gas (see above rules). You will back into the car behind you and further embarass yourself.
   
2. ...

That's it for today. Until next time, may all your DT encounters be pleasant, speedy, and accident-free.

Drive-Thru Etiquette, a Handy Reference Guide

As promised, here is the first installment of Drive-Thru Etiquette, a Handy Reference Guide. The following recommendations are based on my true experiences as an employee working a drive-thru window and should be taken with a grain of salt, a wedge of lime, and a shot of espresso.

Please use the following legend to assist you as you browse this guide:

DT (Drive-Thru Window)
SB (Speaker Box, where the order is placed)
SW (Second Window, a nonexistent place I will ask you to pull forward to if you annoy me)
CCT (Customer Courtesy Tip)
EXR (Extraordinairly Rude Customer)

Smile, You're on Camera

1. FYI - Most DT's have tiny cameras located at the SB. Don't be creeped out - those cameras are invaluable in aiding the order-taking process. After all, it comes in handy to read lips when you get customers who mumble, order through cracked windows, or insist on leaving their diesel engines running.
2. Having said that, when you are at the SB, don't mock me, pick your nose, make faces, put up your finger to "shhss!" me, or otherwise act inappropriately. I can see you.
   

Wait Times

1. If you are in a tremendous hurry, you probably do not have time to stop for coffee, so please don't yell at me BEFORE I'VE EVEN SAID HELLO to tell me you are in a rush. Trust me, I want you out of my hair as quickly as possible.
   
2. CCT #1- Please do not add to your order at the window if there is a long line of cars behind you. This increases the wait time of everyone behind you by minimum of sixty seconds and we all know that can feel like an eternity when you haven't had your coffee.
3. EXR - Please do not be irked at my speed of service when it's not my fault that the three cars in front of you did not follow CCT #1.
4. CCT #2 - Do not lollygag at the SB while cars stack up behind you. Ham? Bacon? Be decisive and move on.
5. CCT #3 - Once you have placed your order at the SB, please pull up behind the next car in line. When you linger after you place an order and block the SB, I can't expedite orders for the people behind you.
   

Medical Emergencies

1. If your passenger is experiencing a possible stroke or heart attack, you should resist the urge to stop through the DT for coffee and instead proceed to the nearest ER.
2. If you, against better judgement, stop for coffee anyway, please do not tell me I need to hurry because your passenger is having said medical emergency.
3. If you discover an injured wild owl in your backyard and you are en-route to the zoo, you have no business stopping for hot chocolate. You probably have no business transporting the owl, either, but that's not my department.
   

Let's Talk

1. You should always expect a friendly greeting when you pull up to the SB. We do not hire out prisoners in India to greet you nor do we use recordings. We are live people, inside the building before you, with very real feelings. Please do not cut me off while I am speaking. It is rude.
2. Dear customer, please do not be agitated with me or cut me off when I am offering you a drink special or pastry pairing. It is my JOB to suggest add-ons for your order. A polite decline is all that's required.
   
3. Do not ask me how I am doing and then proceed to bark orders without giving me a chance to respond. We all know the "how are you's" are just a formality, but it's still polite to let the other person answer.
4. For those of you who ask how we're doing and give us the chance to respond, thank you for your genuine kindness. It is always appreciated.
   

I don't want to overload you with information, so we'll end today's lesson here. Thank you for taking the time to read and learn. We appreciate your business.